LOTP archives

June 22nd, 2005

Here are some early attempts at LOTP trumps: Pisser on the Turd and Rosy Rockets.
I just resurrected the second half of the Monkey Chews entry. I had hidden it partly because I thought it was rubish and partly because I couldn’t decide how to report the fracas with the required sensitivity.

It pays to increase your word power

Wanksocratic Interrogation
Of the limp-witted, to sarcastically pose a rhetorical question.
Comic Sans Humour
Corporate wit.
The Lottery, with its weekly pay-out of enormous prizes, was the one public event to which the proles paid serious attention. It was probable that there were some millions of proles for whom the Lottery was the principal if not the only reason for remaining alive. It was their delight, their folly, their anodyne, their intellectual stimulant. Where the Lottery was concerned, even people who could barely read and write seemed capable of intricate calculations and staggering feats of memory. There was a whole tribe of men who made a living simply by selling systems, forecasts, and lucky amulets. Winston had nothing to do with the running of the Lottery, which was managed by the Ministry of Plenty, but he was aware (indeed everyone in the party was aware) that the prizes were largely imaginary. Only small sums were actually paid out, the winners of the big prizes being non-existent persons.