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Chummy Popples
October 12th, 2005
Vox Populi, Vox Dei
E-Fun for the Attention Starved, the Small Minded and the Socially Inept
Chummy Popples is cool! It’s like you’re a character in a soap, and not a boring, paranoid loser any more. It’s hyper-real. The white noise needn’t stop with phone calls, emails and text messaging. It’s a sandbox. It’s a puppet show. Express yourself in ways you never dared. Stage fright, huh? Adopt the generic smiley face of the online journal culture. Smiley faces and disclaimers wipe-clean your identity. Nobody can hear your stammer or see your buck teeth. Will you deal in vitriol or sugar-fluff? Either one, but never the twain.
New Members
Skool Nickname:
Age: (minus 10 years)
Name of your best friend:
Would you take a bullet for this person?
Would you fuck them over for £100?
What’s your price then?: £
Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
But is there anyone you’d rather be with?
So are you really in love, or just scared and horny?
Favourite book:
Have you read this book?
Favourite band:
I’ve heard of that band. Are you sure you still like them?
Click on the button below to have this information sent to MI5, the FBI, the NME, MTV, Newsnight, the Queen, your mum and God 
Of course zombies do filing. Someone has to maintain order after the apocalypse. They have yet to master the intricacies of the dewey decimal, mind.
In other news, the buses here smell like fog. Why is that?
She’s on top form, isn’t she? I don’t know which one is her.
Wacky, Rockets. You’ve become wacky.
Come home, honey, your blog is real sick.
Matt, the buses in Sheffield smell of steel and unemployment. In Nottingham they smell of guns and unemployment. I can only assume, therefore, that you are marooned on the Isle of Avalon.
Do I win £5?
My original comment now makes no sense whatsoever.
Such is the way of the world. Next week, how to shovel a goose up with a speculum.
Your comment had one non sequitur, now it has two. Blow me.
Too late, I wrote it down.
I deleted your comment because it was shit, not because you pretended you wanted to send kiddy porn to my dad.