Dionne’s Healthy Responses to Negative Energisation
Lachrymose or bellicose behavioral choices actually promote negative energisation, and these all-too-common response modes are not only unsightly, but alienating and distressing for the guy who fucked your girlfriend. The best way to handle feelings of gut-wrenching anguish, bile-spewing rage or even just everyday weltschmerz can be followed in [...]
Where does inspiration come in boxes?
a) Boots Pharmacy
b) Ceramic Tile Warehouse
c) Leith Mortuary
If you answered b), then you could be a potential champion of the advert game. Suitable for ages 9 to 99. That’s and, not to. Whilst getting brainwashed by “messages”, affect mental skill and agility by screeching like Pavlov’s consumer monkeys. MB [...]
Vox Populi, Vox Dei
E-Fun for the Attention Starved, the Small Minded and the Socially Inept
Chummy Popples is cool! It’s like you’re a character in a soap, and not a boring, paranoid loser any more. It’s hyper-real. The white noise needn’t stop with phone calls, emails and text messaging. It’s a sandbox. [...]
When I worked at a geriatric hospital I heard about a senile out-patient who tried to cook frozen food on his electric bar fire. How his face must have glowed orange like a setting sun in the darkened flat, as he knelt on arthritic knees to reverentially proffer a single stiffened string bean to [...]
It pays to increase your word power. But you must prune the deadwood before the shrub of your vocabulary can grow.
“It goes without saying that…”: Let your flimsy generalisations rot in paralepsis.
“It’s what I like to call…”: Don’t pollute my impressionable mind with your radical world view.
Here are some early attempts at LOTP trumps: Pisser on the Turd and Rosy Rockets.
I just resurrected the second half of the Monkey Chews entry. I had hidden it partly because I thought it was rubish and partly because I couldn’t decide how to report the fracas with the required sensitivity.
DID YOU KNOW?? Will Self’s fave cold brunch is smack-topped jacket potatoes (served cold; like revenge, or a lolly). He sold the rights to this phrase to his twin brother Chilly Gonzalez, who used it in a rap composed especially for the Royal Variety show.